Greatest Love of My Life

by Shirley
(Samou)

We met when we moved to the city. He was always chasing after me but at that time he already had a girlfriend and I didn’t bother getting involved with him. Desmond always teased me when I walked passed him and his friends and I started to hate him but I knew in my heart that I loved him even though I knew he had a girlfriend.

As the time passed by, I started to fall for him and he ask me if I would be his girlfriend and I said yes. Never in my life I felt so happy as if nothing else matters. It was just me and him and no one else.

After awhile, he became jealous and started to hit me if I talked to other guys. I did nothing because I loved him and I thought that he is just jealous because he loves me and is afraid to lose me. But if I confronted him about other girls he would just pretend if I am crazy and say, "If you are going to keep on going on like this, I'm going to slap you."

But still I love him even more and I was afraid to lose him. Then I turned to other guys for comfort and I started cheating on him just because it felt good to know that other guys finds me attractive and treat me like a woman.

I still loved my boyfriend and I couldn’t stand to lie to him any more. I decided to stop and we talked about it and everything went back to normal. Little did I know, he was seeing another woman.

One day, one of his friends came to me and told me that he was having an affair I confronted him and he denied. I remember it as it was yesterday when I saw Desmond with his new girlfriend walking past our house. They were in love and it felt like someone had stabbed me in my heart at that moment.

I just wanted to be alone. I had no one to support me. My parents did not like him at all and I had no friends as he wouldn’t want me to have friends. I was so heartbroken. I just walked blinded by my tears... when I came to my senses, I was at the graveyard.

After that day I never saw him. One day, I was on my way to the shop with a friend. He is in love with me but I am still hurt and my ex walked past us. He started to hit my friend as he thought we were together and I tried to tell him that there is nothing between us and he has a girlfriend and he must leave me alone. He said that he loved me and no one can have me.

My ex and I began an affair. We were so in love and we just love each other. During all this, his girlfriend was pregnant and we stopped the affair.

I started to date new boys but he was still jealous of me and he hit me every time he saw me with a guy. After his child's birth, we started the affair again until his girlfriend caught us. We had a fight we stopped seeing each other and after that for about a year, we didn’t worry about each other.

This year, we got back together as an official couple and he left his child’s mother and I know we are back together. We love each other more than ever but suddenly I began to get sick and I went to the doctor I was diagnosed with cancer. There was nothing they could do for me anymore. That's why I wrote this in my diary so that Desmond must know how much I love him. I loved him for all the seven years we were together.