Surviving a Long Distance Relationship

“Why do I feel like I’m surviving a long distance relationship?”

In many ways, it feels like you’re surviving a long distance relationship. Two people trying to keep their life in order and also trying to keep someone far away in their every thoughts.

The great news is that with a little patience, trust, and acceptance, long distance relationships can be every bit as thrilling as new love. It can really bring two people together because it gives you a chance to get back to learning who each other really is deep inside.

It’s great to have that person to snuggle up to also, but for now, we’ll have to deal with “snuggly thoughts” instead.

Tell him how you feel

Everyone loves to know that they have someone who is their biggest fan. When surviving a long distance relationship, it’s crucial that both of you never skimp on the praise and good feelings. When he tells you about some great accomplishment, let him know how proud that makes you. Let him know when he comes to you in a dream (especially the sexy ones). Make sure he knows that you really are thinking about him all the time.

What this does is it helps him feel better about being away from you. Even the best of us get those painful little jealous thoughts every once in awhile. If he hears about how much you think about him, he will be less likely to question your intentions.

It’s OK to worship him a little. He’ll be flattered and it will put his mind at ease also.

Tell him how you feel (part two)

Sometimes you might have a bad day or just get a thought in your mind that you can’t get out. You can let him know you’re hurting, but be careful of how (and how much) you do it.

Don’t bum him out every time you talk or email. Sure, you’re missing him dearly and it can be a little depressing, but being the manic-far-away girl that always bums him out is not going to keep this long distance relationship going. Keep in mind that he's struggling with surviving a long distance relationship too. It is crucial that you let him know that you really do miss him, but you’re handling it. It’s driving you mad that you are far away from each other, but everything is better the moment you hear his voice. Got it?

It is healthy to have thoughts and questions about how strong your love really is. It’s also fine to bring it up every once in awhile, but don’t do it all the time. Your ultimate goal is to show him that you are the awesomest (super-freakin-sweetest) chick in the world. No one else compares to you and he’d be a dumbass not to realize that.

Awesomest?

Let’s keep that thought for a moment. How do you keep a man enchanted with you? You can do it with your beauty. You can rule over him with an iron fist. However, the best way to do it is by being enchanting.

What if he has so much fun every time he talks to you and leaves the conversation feeling invigorated? Probably, he will crave talking to you! He will think about you a lot more often and will honestly miss you. Part of being awesome is the ability to make those around you much more happy than they already are.

Leave on a high note

It’s pretty hard sometimes to play the part especially since you’re sad that he’s not there. Your goal is to let him know what you’re feeling, but what if you figure out how always end serious conversations with a really funny story about something embarrassing that happened to you?

In most conversations, we always try to start with our best story. We just can’t wait to tell him the most interesting thing first. Wait for it, especially if you have “business” to talk about. That way, you never leave him depressed and focused on how hard it is surviving a long distance relationship. Always have a funny or great thing to tell him right before you both hang up.

Make yourself better

Typical advice on surviving a long distance relationship tells you to “find some busywork to do.” Do you really want to spend the next few months or years wasting your life on stupid tasks just because you’re sad about your relationship?

Forget that! Find something to do that makes you smarter. Find something to do that gets you in awesome shape. Do something that gives you awesome stories to tell your far-away boyfriend. Take some courses that will help you get a better job. Your life doesn’t grind to a stop because you don’t have someone to squeeze. Get out and do something great.

What if when your boyfriend and you meet up for a holiday and you are way smarter, cooler, or better looking than you used to be? He will do everything in his power to keep you. How do you make a man crave you? Make some (or all) aspects of yourself more valuable. Give him a reason to say, “Wow!” after not seeing you for a while.

Sure, in a way, this too is busywork. But this is also a great opportunity for you. You’re not just locked in your house worried about surviving a long distance relationship. Instead, you’re spending your time making yourself into a more compelling person and letting him know that no one compares to you.