What are the best online dating tips for finding that perfect man?
That’s right. You have the luxury of email so you don’t have to respond right away. You can take your time composing the perfect reply before you send it. The biggest problem most people run into when getting into Internet dating is that they “should’ve said this or that.” Instead they type as fast as they can and give away way too much information. If this has been you in the past, then the best online dating tips are that you really need a crash course on how to flirt with men.
What makes online dating so different is that in the real world, you get the benefits of reading body language, seeing the sights, smelling the smells. On the Internet, all you have are your words. This is beneficial because it gives a guy a chance to fall for your intellect before all of the primate senses get a chance to throw in their two bananas.
Some of the best advice for online dating tips is to be mysterious! he has no way to tell anything about you besides your picture and your profile, and he wants to know more. Keep trickling information to him as you see fit and he’ll always want more.
Seduce him with your words
How can you accomplish this “blind seduction?” Let’s think about seduction for a second. What is seduction? Without busting out a dictionary, most people would guess it has something to do with enticement and temptation. It could also include making someone do something against better judgment.
Oooh, racy! So how is this accomplished? You need to be mysterious! We all want the things that we can’t have or we don’t completely understand. If you spend the first few emails giving a blow-by-blow retelling of your entire life, it is not only the anti-seduction, it also makes you common and boring. Of all our online dating tips, the one you should pay particular interest in is avoiding coming off as every other woman on the Internet.
Choose instead to only give him little snippets of your life and avoid answering any questions with direct answers. Let’s say he asks what you do for a living. You could just say, “I’m a secretary,” which isn’t sexy or interesting at all. OR, you could say, “I talk to anxious men on the phone all day.” Whether it’s true or not, who cares? You just ratcheted his heart rate up a notch and made his mind explode with a thousand new questions.
Keep him on his toes
When you make a man think… when you make him think about you, you are already claiming his desires. There will be all kinds of time later to explain that you are just a boring old secretary, but consider again why you are here: to get the first date! Your online persona doesn’t have to be exactly who you are. She can be an astronaut, a secret agent, a ballerina. The more random and ridiculous you can be in your emails and text messages, the more fun he will be having and the more he will CRAVE meeting you in person.
Of course, it helps if you can give him such fun times in the real world, but for now, we’ve got our eye on that first date.
“So what if he freaks out that I’m acting so crazy?”
Screw him? Are you really looking for a boyfriend who is so fragile? Do you want someone who makes your life even more boring or someone who draws you into fun and excitement that you can share together? In order to get an exciting guy, you have to at least seem to be exciting when you interact with him.
When it comes to online dating tips, one of the best is to consider what you are looking for. Are you seeking someone who can lead you to new experiences? Do you want that “you and me against the world” feeling? Do you want to be exposed to new flavors and music and cultures? Or do you just need someone on the couch to make you feel secure.
That was a trick question because we all want someone secure there on the couch, but we crave someone who can lead us into adventure. Magically, so is he. Humans are cursed with that underlying dread that there is so much more out there that we’ll never experience. We look to our relationships to lead us to the unknown.
Can your words lead him towards adventure? Can your playful banter excite him to the challenge of struggling to win your heart? Play and explore. Play and explore. There will be time to talk to him about the sad things in your life. There will be a perfect moment for you to reveal your dark secrets. Just don’t do them right now through email.
Another gem from the online dating tips war chest is to give him the gift of missing you. Always wait a few moments (or hours) to respond to that first email of the day. Give yourself a chance to think about how you’ll respond while you go do other things. You know as well as I do that after giving it some thought, the perfect thing always pops into your head. If you’ve already responded, you have lost this opportunity to be much more cute or suave or sensual than that first response.
Avoid getting into the habit of being habitually available. It makes you look desperate and sets a dangerous precedent if you two form a relationship. He’ll always expect you to answer his phone calls and emails right away and might get angry or offended when you don’t.
From the very beginning, you set the pace of the relationship. If he writes something you don’t like, wait a day to respond. If he seems overly-anxious to get a reply to his email, WAIT. I know sometimes this is hard because you want to respond so badly, but anticipation is a great aphrodisiac. These online dating tips are especially effective whenever he exposes he deep feelings about anything. Leaving him to wait will drive him crazy with expectation.
“What kind of online dating tips are these?
I don’t want to be a jerk! Aren’t we just playing games now?”
You bet your bottom, sister! Once you master understanding human emotions, you become such a better girlfriend/wife/mother. By always giving in or just plain giving, you never realize the power of elevating his desire. This concept is explained perfectly in the eBook, Rousing the Lion. You need to allow a man to feel like he’s conquering you. It brings him in way deeper than you could ever accomplish by just being forward and direct with him. The best part of all is that you are controlling everything!
Obviously, there are millions of other online dating tips, but the one you really need to drive home is simply to play it cool. There is all the time in the world once you settle into a relationship, but for now it’s all about mystery and anticipation.