“This is rough! I need some great long distance relationship tips.”
Sometimes relationships can make you happy all the way down to your soul. Sometimes, they will make you miserable. How you handle the misery tells how strong your love really is. As with any interaction between two people, the more you talk about things, the more you know about each other. Some women have the idea that your man should “just know” about certain things that make you happy or sad. Sure, it’s awesome to have someone love you who knows exactly what to say or do just perfectly. When you have a situation where he’s not there to “know,” don’t leave it to chance. You have to say what you mean and say what you want in a long distance relationship. There’s no other way around it.
You can’t be mysterious and just hope he’ll guess. You’re bound to be disappointed a lot. If this is something you are serious about, then you really need the book, Long Distance Love Guide. Get tons of great advice and insight on how to hold on to the love you share.
Long distance relationship tips part one: Pre-plan
So you just heard he has to move away for his job or maybe he got into a great college on the other side of the nation. Perhaps you just got transferred to the corporate headquarters at your work. One of you has got to go away for an indefinite period of time. Ideally, you have a little time to get things in order, but then you think of your boyfriend and that sinking feeling comes in.
You guys are great together! You’ve made it to the point in the relationship that you are totally happy. You truly love each other. Is it worth trying to keep something going if you’re going to be so far away from each other? You both think so and decide to keep things going even though you might only be able to see each other every once in awhile.
The very first of your long distance relationship tips you need to consider is to start having “the talk” right away. How will you manage your long distance relationship? What do you expect from him? What does he expect from you? What will happen when you two get back together? What is your future?
Knowing what he thinks about everything will really help you decide if you can make this happen. It also sets the stage for what you are both expecting to get out of the relationship.
All of this should happen before someone leaves town. You need to know the rules to the game before you play it. Have you ever felt cheated when playing a sport and someone tells you a rule you’ve never heard of in the middle of the game? It’s the same way here. Think about everything you can. If sleeping with other people is off limits, is kissing them? If you promise to talk on the phone every night, does email count? If you guys are talking about marriage, will it happen when you get back together or before that?
The more you discuss what’s acceptable and what’s not, the clearer your rules of conduct become. Basically, you have to know what the law is to know if you’re breaking it.
Get to know each other
Technology has made long distance relationships easier than ever before. Email and instant messaging are pretty much immediate and free. If you’ve never had a written relationship with this person before, then you get to see a whole different side of him. Use this time to ask all those silly questions you never could before. An outstanding place to start is with the book 1000 Questions for Couples. This really is your chance to completely get to know each other. Once things go physical, not a lot of relationships get the chance to really find out what the other person is about (probably because the physical aspect is so much fun!).
Now for the gem among our long distance relationship tips: stop being so boring! If you fear he might be sniffing around for other women, then don’t be so boring. When you talk on the phone, avoid all of the minute-by-minute recounting of the day’s events.
Not only is it not really that interesting, he’s probably tuning it out anyway. When you think about it, who sounds more attractive? The girl who’s telling him what someone said at the salon while she was getting her nails done or the new one who’s asking him questions about himself. Now more than ever, you have to keep him excited about you. You really need to put him on a quest to keep your love! This sweet little course will teach you how to talk dynamically and keep him listening to every word. It’s almost unfair how well this system works. He won’t know anything except how much he loves you.
This takes some effort, but it’s well worth it. Every day, think of one or two questions you have about him. Instead of blabbing about the bad sandwich you ate today or the horribly disfigured zit growing on your nose, ask him questions and let him talk about himself. “What was your most embarrassing moment as a little kid?” “If you were a politician, what bill would you write?” The great thing about off the wall questions is that it gives you both something stimulating to talk about. This binds the attraction you have for each other and brings you closer together.
Figure out how to meet in person and often
Always have the next time you’ll see each other in the plans. It gives you both hope. Even if it’s a year from now, never let there be a moment when this becomes ambiguous. Waiting a year is way better than “whenever.” It gives you something to talk about. It gives you something to look forward to. It gives you something tangible to dream about. Always look for ways to meet each other. It doesn’t always have to be “you come here, then I’ll go there.” You can meet somewhere in the middle. In fact, one of the secret relationship tips is to try to meet at fun locations and avoid making one of you coming home altogether. It takes away all the distractions and makes together time all about you and him. No friends or family to swing by and chew up the night. No job obligations to tear one of you away. When you always meet up on “vacation” like this, it makes the relationship take on a magical feel. He will always associate you with fun and frolicking.
When you go to a place where neither one of you has friends, it becomes just about you. This makes together time all the more special. If you really want a romantic treat, we can’t talk enough about a sweet little “Bed and Breakfast” Inn. They’re all over the place and so much fun. The best part is that it always feels like coming home. Check and see if there are any near you. It will make your little interludes feel like mini honeymoons…
Traveling is cheaper than ever before. Start a travel budget. You can have your bank automatically deduct money from your main account into a separate savings account. Pretty soon, you realize you have enough money for a plane ticket (or bus ticket). If both of you start an account, then you can switch off coming to visit.
Make it an online relationship
Yeah, we already mentioned this, but it’s the easiest among our long distance relationship tips. Figure out ways to maximize the experience of having an online relationship. Before he leaves, buy both of you a webcam so you can see each other.
If you don’t already have one, get an instant messenger account. You can write back and forth while you do other things online.
Get a digital camera and figure out how to send him pictures of you. Flooding him with all kinds of pictures is a great way to keep you on his mind. Get used to taking pictures of yourself everywhere you go. My friend loves to go shopping and takes tons of sexy pictures of herself in the changing rooms. She doesn’t always buy some of the outfits she poses in, but you won’t hear her boyfriend in Iraq complaining.
Avoid pictures of you with guys he doesn’t know. It’s just a dumb idea and an obvious long distance relationship tips.
Get a VOIP account. It stands for “Voice over IP” and helps you to make free or very low cost phone calls over the Internet. The quality might not be perfect, but it’s getting better, plus you can’t beat the price. If you both have iPhones, you can Facetime. Or you can Skype on pretty much any device. Great communication where you can see each other will keep your love alive.
One of our favorite long distance relationship tips is to get a completely separate email account used only for emailing your long distance boyfriend. That way, you can never have any accidents by sending mail to him he was not meant to see.
Make things SEXY!
Just because you can’t see him, doesn’t mean you can keep the relationship sexual. In fact, this is a key ingredient to making sure you are the only woman on his mind.
Figure out sexy things you can say to him and always keep him guessing what’s really on your mind. Now is not the time to be shy. He’s far away and frustrated that he can’t just swing by for some smooches or a little tickle. You MUST tickle him constantly and remind him know how sensual you are.
Now things get racy! Have you ever though of Long Distance Lovemaking? This awesome little ebook helps you get over your shyness and engage him sexually even though you are miles away. This is a definite must have guide for anyone trying to make an LDR work.
Keep yourself busy
The worst thing you can do is sit at home all day and night waiting for him to call. Get out and live your life! It’s a great time to get active and create a body that he will definitely long for.
What are you doing with your life right now? Are you moving in a direction? Are you pursuing your dreams? Your man isn’t going to stay attracted to you forever if you don’t look like you’ve got any dreams. Spend some time looking into creating a better life for yourself. If you can show your fella how put together you can be and that you’re going places, he is definitely going to see you as long term potential. We promise that it not only will make your life better, but it will also give you something awesome to think about. This step here we can’t stress enough!
Come back often as we are expanding our long distance relationship tips section. As always, we are here to provide the best advice for real world situations.